dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize