Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
