Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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