You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
