I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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