Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
