Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
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