i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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