i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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