we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
His nipple licking is glorious
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