I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Randomize
