i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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