No stitches, just platelets and will power
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
