Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
the condom got lost in my hair
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
