Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
