Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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