My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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