I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
