it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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