i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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