I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize