I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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