Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
