Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I have tasted many bathrooms
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
