i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize