He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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