is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
