I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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