Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
