she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
