Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Can I color on your dick again?
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
