How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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