I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
