hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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