Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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