chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Randomize
