Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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