Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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