Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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