did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
This baby is an asshole
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Randomize
