There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
She needs sedatives and a leash
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Randomize
