either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
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