I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Randomize
