Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
