I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
