i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
