the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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