My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I'm at about main and main street
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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