I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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