are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize
